My first outing as a single man,
Can’t say it really went to plan,
Bold thoughts I had to go it alone,
To face down the world like Al Capone.
In my head I was the social person of old,
But now that room just felt cold,
Without you on my arm to keep me warm,
I simply wasn’t up to my best form.
Thought I would manage to chat and be witty,
But alone I think I look lost and someone to pity,
No one came near or made eye contact,
As if by some disease I was racked.
And as I looked around the audience,
Couples everywhere which of course does make sense,
Engrossed in each other’s idle chat,
Me a fish out of water, feeling a twat.
Come on come on bring down the light,
Start the play so I can hide my fright,
Let me get lost in the dark and never come out,
What was I thinking “it’s too soon” I hear my brain shout.
The play is short and I can soon escape the throng,
Leave behind all those eyes staring at me for so long,
But a neighbour sees me as I try to leave,
Asks “how are you doing on this Sunday eve?”.
“I’m doing well” I lie through my teeth,
Barely able to control my welling grief,
What does he really expect me to say in reply,
“That I’m barely coping to breath and want to die?”
3 weeks on how does he expect me to feel,
Oblivious to how long these wounds will take to heal,
Because I am walking they assume the worst is over and done,
That I will be getting on now and having some fun.
I run back to my awaiting car,
Staring at the night sky looking for your star,
To comfort me by seeing you looking down from above,
Watching over me as you promised, my sweet love.
